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Jodi Sta. Maria on her failed marriage: 'I felt like I was the biggest failure'

Jodi on remarrying: "In my heart I know I would want to take that road again with the right person."

Patricia Matalog
by
Patricia Matalog

2/7/2022 in News
Jodi Sta. Maria on her failed marriage: 'I felt like I was the biggest failure'

Jodi Sta. Maria may have a healthy co-parenting relationship with her ex-husband Pampi Lacson now, but it actually hadn't been an easy road for her to come this far.

Speaking to Karen Davila on her latest vlog, the "The Broken Marriage Vow" actress shared how her own broken marriage vow became one of her most painful experiences in life. She separated from Pampi just five years after they tied the knot.

“It is something na nangyari sa life ko na masasabi ko na isa sa pinaka painful, [kasi] hindi ka naman papasok sa isang commitment or covenant para lang masira ‘di ba," Jodi shared.

“So during that time when my marriage didn’t work out, I felt like I was the biggest failure, the biggest joke. Nagkaroon ako ng feelings of shame and guilt. Na, 'Shocks, nakakahiya.' Kumbaga hindi ko ‘to naayos. Hindi ko nabigyan si Thirdy ng buong pamilya.”

 

 

Jodi then resorted to partying and drinking as her coping mechanism. 

“I used to be spending a lot of time with friends because I needed some distraction. I did a lot of partying just to drown down all the pain and forget. Pagkagising ko the following day, masakit na puso ko, masakit pa ‘yung ulo ko. Na-double trouble pa ‘ko. Ano ba 'yan!” she quipped.

Thanks to her back-to-back acting projects, Jodi was able to keep her mind off of things.

But what really made Jodi overcome her own broken marriage was to choose forgiveness for the sake of her own peace.

“At first naman, I wouldn’t say naman talaga na after the separation, ‘Sige na, let’s be friends.’ Walang ganun. Siyempre a heartbreak is a heartbreak. You will have to go through all these feelings of grief and loss and it will never be easy," she said. 

“But I guess dadating ka sa time na maiisip mo, ano ba ang mas importante, 'yung nararamdaman ko every day na ganito na punong-puno ng anger and resentment 'yung heart ko, or does my soul deserve peace?"

Jodi also feels that being at peace with her ex-husband would be what's best for their son Thirdy.

At that time also, naawa din talaga ako sa anak ko. Naipit talaga siya sa dalawang nag-uumpugang bato. Hindi na nga namin siya nabigyan ng pamilyang buo, iipitin pa ba namin siya sa gulo namin because hindi kami magkasundo? Forgiveness is a choice that we can make every single day," said Jodi.

 

 

Now, having established a modern family setup with Pampi, and her being on the dating scene again, Jodi could happily describe the state of her heart as "buong-buo."

Asked if she's ready to get married again, Jodi admitted wholeheartedly: "In my heart I know I would want to take that road again. With the right person and in God's perfect time."

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